Music

I perform covers, originals and comic songs – or I can write a song especially for your occasion, friend, party – anything you need I’ll give it a bash.

Your own song!

If you want to send a big thanks to nan, have a song about an event, take the piss out of your friend, or any other theme – I will write a song for you and perform it on the day.

A few choice details about the person or occasion and a couple of weeks to write is all I need. It’s £50 extra and you can get a preview if you need to make sure it works.

I can be nice, sweet, silly or an absolute bastard – depending on what you want. What I won’t be is cruel or unkindly prejudiced.

Covers

My covers range across the decades, with a lot from the 80’s, and getting less as you go back or forward. There’s a list on the right (below on mobile). You can request an exact set-list or just a general feel.

If you’d like a particular song performed which is not on the list (within reason, not Mahler’s Third, or Bohemian Rhapsody on the xylophone!) you can request it with at least a fortnights notice. I’ll do my best to learn it.

Originals

My material is mostly dark, with a few weird bits, in a sort of folk / rock vein. Some is beautiful finger-picking, others shouty rage songs. I’m building this site (as of March 2019) and given time I’ll post some examples.

Comedy

I tend to re-write popular song lyrics, with a very rare original. This is a new thing I’ve found I like doing, so I have 6-8 so far. I won’t post them as it rather spoils the joke to know the punchline. Most can be made family friendly, and there’s only a few rude words anyway – I try and be funny rather than just swear and hope you laugh.

Booking Ain’t Fancy

If you’d like to book, use the contact form on the home page, or call me:

07455 744454

Prank calls should include sexually inappropriate content and details of where to meet.

Covers I Do

I'm Not In Love

10cc

What's Up

4 Non Blondes

Take On Me

a-ha

The Sun Always Shines On TV

a-ha

Gimmie Gimmie Gimmie

ABBA

The Winner Takes It All

ABBA

All That She Wants

Ace Of Bass

Antmusic

Adam Ant

Stand and Deliver

Adam Ant

Goody Two Shoes

Adam Ant

Prince Charming

Adam Ant

Rolling in the Deep

Adele

Someone Like You

Adele

Love Is A Losing Game

Amy Winehouse

Back To Black

Amy Winehouse

I'm No Good

Amy Winehouse

Wish I Didn't Miss You

Angie Stone

Hope There's Someone

Antony and the Johnsons

Keep The Car Running

Arcade Fire

Neighbourhood#1

Arcade Fire

Neighbourhood#3

Arcade Fire

Rebellion

Arcade Fire

Stayin Alive

Bee Gees

Rebel Yell

Billy Idol

White Wedding

Billy Idol

Always A Woman

Billy Joel

Bachelorette

Bjork

Joga

Bjork

Play Dead

Bjork

Hard to Handle

Black Crowes

Call Me

Blondie

Hanging On The Telephone

Blondie

Heart Of Glass

Blondie

Charlemagne

Blossoms

There's No Other Way

Blur

Don't Think Twice It's Alright

Bob Dylan

Make You Feel My Love

Bob Dylan

Buffalo Soldier

Bob Marley

No Woman No Cry

Bob Marley

One Love, People Get Ready

Bob Marley

Redemption Song

Bob Marley

Three Little Birds

Bob Marley

Dust on the Ground

Bombay Bicycle Club

Total Eclipse of the Heart

Bonnie Tyler

Make It With You

Bread

One More Time

Britney Spears

Small Town Boy

Bronski Beat

When I Was Your Man

Bruno Arse

Run to You

Bryan Adams

Summer of 69

Bryan Adams

Word Up

Cameo

Drive

Cars

White Shirt

Charlatans

Thirst For Romance

Cherry Ghost

Wicked Game

Chris Isaac

Road To Hell

Chris Rea

Trouble

Coldplay

Yellow

Coldplay

Dreaming Of You

Coral

Ridiculous Thoughts

Cranberries

Don't Dream It's Over

Crowded House

Four Seasons In One Day

Crowded House

Time After Time

Cyndi Lauper

True Colours

Cyndi Lauper

Get Lucky

Daft Punk

Cannonball

Damien Rice

Elephant

Damien Rice

Changes

David Bowie

China Girl

David Bowie

Heroes

David Bowie

Kooks

David Bowie

Life On Mars

David Bowie

Rebel Rebel

David Bowie

Rock and Roll Suicide

David Bowie

Space Oddity

David Bowie

Starman

David Bowie

The Man Who Sold The World

David Bowie

Nothing Ever Happens

Del Amitri

Runaway

Del Shannon

Behind The Wheel

Depeche Mode

Little 15

Depeche Mode

Never Let Me Down Again

Depeche Mode

Personal Jesus

Depeche Mode

Brothers In Arms

Dire Straits

Romeo and Juliet

Dire Straits

Sultans Of Swing

Dire Straits

The Man's Too Strong

Dire Straits

Drift Away

Dobie Gray

Jolene

Dolly Parton

The Killing Moon

Echo And The Bunnymen

Munich

Editors

Fugitive Motel

Elbow

Leaders of the Free World

Elbow

Powder Blue

Elbow

Red

Elbow

Scattered Black and White

Elbow

Switching Off

Elbow

Mr Blue Sky

ELO

I Can't Help Falling In Love With You

Elvis Presley

Caught in a Trap

Elvis Presley

In The Ghetto

Elvis Presley

Just Can't Help Believing

Elvis Presley

Stormy Weather

Etta James

Love Is A Stranger

Eurythmics

Sweet Dreams

Eurythmics

When Tomorrow Comes

Eurythmics

Who's That Girl

Eurythmics

Good Thing

Fine Young Cannibals

I'm Not The Man I Used To Be

Fine Young Cannibals

Johnny come Home

Fine Young Cannibals

She Drives Me Crazy

Fine Young Cannibals

Dreams

Fleetwood Mac

Go Your Own Way

Fleetwood Mac

No Light, No Light

Florence + The Machine

Shake It Out

Florence + The Machine

What The Water Gave Me

Florence + The Machine

You've Got The Love

Florence + The Machine

Fly Me To The Moon

Frank Sinatra

My Funny Valentine

Frank Sinatra

My Way

Frank Sinatra

That's Life

Frank Sinatra

Tonight Tonight Tonight

Genesis

Lovely Head

Goldfrapp

A&E

Goldfrappe

19-2000

Gorillaz

Somebody That I Used To Know

Gotye

A Simple Answer

Grizzly Bear

Speak In Rounds

Grizzly Bear

Yet Again

Grizzly Bear

Civil War

Guns n Roses

Sweet Child Of Mine

Guns n Roses

No One Is To Blame

Howard Jones

86 TV's

I Am Kloot

Morning Rain

I Am Kloot

Storm Warning

I Am Kloot

Radioactive

Imagine Dragons

Mystify

INXS

Need You Tonight

INXS

Never Tear Us Apart

INXS

Born Of Frustration

James

Sit Down

James

Zombie

Jamie T

Piece of my Heart

Janis Joplin

Crosstown Traffic

Jimi Hendrix

Crazy Baby

Joan Osbourne

Annie's Song

John Denver

Leaving On A Jet-Plane

John Denver

Gravity

John Mayer

Hurt

Johnny Cash Version

River

Joni Mitchell

Love Will Tear Us Apart

Joy Division

Charlotte Anne

Julian Cope

World Shut Your Mouth

Julian Cope

I Predict A Riot

Kaiser Chiefs

Bedshaped

Keane

Everybody's Changing

Keane

She Has No Time

Keane

Somewhere Only We Know

Keane

Sex on Fire

Kings of Leon

Use Somebody

Kings of Leon

All I Want

Kodaline

Rock n Roll

Led Zeppelin

Hallelujah

Leonard Cohen

You Don't Own Me

Lesley Gore

On And On

Longpigs

Rock n Roll

Lou Reed

Baggy Trousers

Madness

It Must Be Love

Madness

My Girl

Madness

Heat Wave

Martha & the Vandellas

Bat Out Of Hell

Meatloaf

Down Under

Men At Work

Overkill

Men At Work

Billie Jean

Michael Jackson

I'm a Believer

Monkees

Steppin Stone

Monkees

Knights in White Satin

Moody Blues

By The Sea

Morcheeba

Over And Over

Morcheeba

Part Of The Process

Morcheeba

Little Lion Man

Mumford and Sons

Torn

Natalie Imbruglia

Cracklin Rosie

Neil Diamond

I Am I Said

Neil Diamond

Love On The Rocks

Neil Diamond

Solitary Man

Neil Diamond

Song Sung Blue

Neil Diamond

Sweet Caroline

Neil Diamond

I Wish I Knew How

Nina Simone

Sinnerman

Nina Simone

Champagne Supernova

Oasis

Look Back In Anger

Oasis

Wonderwall

Oasis

Release Me

Oh Laura

Enola Gay

OMD

Let Her Go

Passenger

Changing Man

Paul Weller

Sunflower

Paul Weller

Wild Wood

Paul Weller

Alive!

Pearl Jam

Daughter

Pearl Jam

Jeremy

Pearl Jam

It's A Sin

Pet Shop Boys

Sledgehammer

Peter Gabriel

Solsbury Hill

Peter Gabriel

In The Air Tonight

Phil Collins

Brick In The Wall

Pink Floyd

Comfortably Numb

Pink Floyd

Mother

Pink Floyd

Shine On You Crazy Diamond

Pink Floyd

Time

Pink Floyd

Wish You Were Here

Pink Floyd

Don't Stand So Close To Me

Police

Every Breath You Take

Police

Walking on the Moon

Police

Glory Box

Portishead

Moving on up

Primal Scream

Crash

Primitives

Darling Niki

Prince

I Could Never Take The Place Of Your man

Prince

Kiss

Prince

Let's Go Crazy

Prince

Purple Rain

Prince

Strange Relationship

Prince

When Doves Cry

Prince

Pretty In Pink

Psychadelic Furs

Common People

Pulp

Disco 2000

Pulp

Bohemian Rhapsody

Queen

Crazy Little Thing Called Love

Queen

Dont Stop Me Now

Queen

Killer Queen

Queen

No-One Knows

Queens Of The Stone Age

Bodysnatchers

Radiohead

Climbing Up The Walls

Radiohead

Creep

Radiohead

Exit Music for a Film

Radiohead

Fake Plastic Trees

Radiohead

High And Dry

Radiohead

High Cards

Radiohead

House Of Cards

Radiohead

How To Disappear Completely

Radiohead

Karma Police

Radiohead

Nice Dream

Radiohead

No Surprises

Radiohead

Nude

Radiohead

Paranoid Android

Radiohead

Street Spirit, Fade Out

Radiohead

Subterranean Homesick Alien

Radiohead

The Bends

Radiohead

The Tourist

Radiohead

Weird Fishes

Radiohead

Under The Bridge

Red Hot Chilli Peppers

Drive

REM

Finest Worksong

REM

Man On The Moon

REM

Orange Crush

REM

The One I Love

REM

19th Nervous Breakdown

Rolling Stones

Brown Sugar

Rolling Stones

Get Off My Cloud

Rolling Stones

Jumping Jack Flash

Rolling Stones

Mother's Little Helper

Rolling Stones

Paint It Black

Rolling Stones

Wild Horses

Rolling Stones

Crazy

Seal

Bridge Over Troubled Water

Simon & Garfunkle

Hazy Shade of Winter

Simon & Garfunkle

Homeward Bound

Simon & Garfunkle

Mrs Robinson

Simon & Garfunkle

Sound of Silence

Simon & Garfunkle

The Boxer

Simon & Garfunkle

Don't You Forget About Me

Simple Minds

Run

Snow Patrol

Tainted Love

Soft Cell

Gold

Spandau Ballet

Cool For Cats

Squeeze

Emily

Stephen Fretwell

Run

Stephen Fretwell

Dakota

Stereophonics

Handbags and Gladrags

Stereophonics

Just Looking

Stereophonics

Make Me Smile

Steve Harley

I Am The Resurrection

Stone Roses

She Bangs The Drum

Stone Roses

She's A Waterfall

Stone Roses

Beautiful Ones

Suede

By The Sea

Suede

Trash

Suede

The Logical Song

Supertramp

Eye of the Tiger

Survivor

Psycho Killer

Talking Heads

Road To Nowhere

Talking Heads

Reward

Teardrop Explodes

Everybody Wants To Rule The World

Tears For Fears

Mad World

Tears for Fears

Shout

Tears For Fears

Dont Let Me Be Misunderstood

The Animals

In The Backseat

The Arcade Fire

Hard Days Night

The Beatles

Help

The Beatles

I Feel Fine

The Beatles

Just Seventeen

The Beatles

With a Little Help From My Friends

The Beatles

Just What I Needed

The Cars

She Sells Sanctuary

The Cult

Boys Don't Cry

The Cure

Caterpillar Girl

The Cure

Charlotte Sometimes

The Cure

Close To Me

The Cure

In Between Days

The Cure

Jumping Someone Else's Train

The Cure

Just Like Heaven

The Cure

Lovecats

The Cure

Lovesong

The Cure

Pictures Of You

The Cure

Primary

The Cure

The Forest

The Cure

Why Can't I Be You

The Cure

Crystal Ship

The Doors

Lost Little GIrl

The Doors

Love Her Madly

The Doors

People Are Strange

The Doors

Soul Kitchen

The Doors

Hotel California

The Eagles

Mountain At My Gates

The Foals

Chelsea Dagger

The Fratellis

Take Me To Church

The Hoziers

Going Underground

The Jam

That's Entertainment

The Jam

Town Called Malice

The Jam

Mr Brightside

The Killers

Lola

The Kinks

You Really Got Me

The Kinks

Heartbeats

The Knife

Fairytale of New York

The Pogues

Every Little Thing She Does Is Magic

The Police

Roxanne

The Police

Be My Little Baby

The Ronettes

Heaven Knows I'm Miserable Now

The Smiths

How Soon Is Now

The Smiths

There Is A Light That Never Goes Out

The Smiths

This Charming Man

The Smiths

What Difference Does It Make

The Smiths

Ghost Town

The Specials

This Is The Day

The The

The Rat

The Walkmen

Substitute

The Who

Suspirium

Thom Yorke

Nutbush City Limits

Tina Turner

Delilah

Tom Jones

Winter

Tori Amos

All I Want Is You

U2

Still Haven't Found What I'm Looking For

U2

Streets Have No Name

U2

With or Without You

U2

Post Break-Up Sex

Vaccines

Riptide

Vance Joy

Becomming a Jackal

Villagers

Nothing Arrived

Villagers

That Day

Villagers

The Meaning Of The Ritual

Villagers

The Pact (I'll Be Your Fever)

Villagers

Here I Go Again

Whitesnake

Always On My Mind

Willie Nelson

Making Plans For Nigel

XTC

Sense Working Overtime

XTC

All Cried Out

Yazoo

Nobody's Diary

Yazoo